Battle of the Spring Finales: RJ Berger

We’ve finally reached the finale for all of our favorite spring shows. And while some finales were so O-M-G! Others were so Oh-Please! The question is which finale was the best of the best? We’ve come to the end of our recaps here with RJ Berger.

So when The Hard Times of RJ Berger originally hit MTV a year ago I was skeptical. It just seemed like a half hour gross fest for teen boys. But with this second season, RJ Berger has really found its footing as a raunchy, but smart teen show. Particularly with its clever animated sequences and the oh-so-cool Inception-inspired opening sequence a few weeks ago. This show is about more than a boy with a large wang.

RJ a la Leo in Inception. Brilliant! Photo: MTV

In case you didn’t know, RJ’s parents are divorced. His dad now lives in a flea-bag motel and works as a stripper (you can go MTV and see his dad’s terrifyingly amazing striptease from a few weeks back). His mom was dating his rude, crude gym teacher/coach and he and Jenny are just friends. Now he’s in love with Amy.

In the finale, RJ is up for Mr. Pinkerton — basically prom or homecoming king, but not –and he’s running with Jenny (as Ms. Pinkerton).  He’s not interested in the title. He didn’t even put his name in. Doesn’t matter though because we need some kind of plot for this episode and this will just have to do. What does matter is that Max, raging school bully and dumb jock, is running too and as Randy Jackson says, “he’s in it to win it!”

Max in shock. Photo: MTV

When Max tries to beat up RJ in front of the whole school, RJ whispers a secret that could potentially ruin Max’s reputation: he saw Max make out with a guy in the shower. For a bully who runs with dumb, homophobic cronies, this secret would mean the end of his popularity. Max immediately drops RJ and backs away in a daze. (Huge departure from Karofsky’s reaction to Kurt on Glee when his secret is discovered. Maybe because Karofsky saw Kurt as everything he feared becoming and Max is just freaked out that someone knows)

While Max catches heat from his bitchy girlfriend, Robin, for “pussying out,” Lily and Jenny — an odd though great friendship — are coming up with contingency plans to ensure Jenny and RJ win Mr. and Ms. Pinkerton.

Everything about Max clicks for Jenny. Photo: MTV

RJ takes a moment to ask Jenny if she ever knew Max was gay. Suddenly, everything clicks: Why Max made her wear a football uniform or why he wore sparkly heels or man-scaped with such care. The two decide that Max doesn’t deserve to have his secret aired for the sake of winning a stupid title and hug it out. This is when Amy decides to walk — more like stalk by — and glare at them.

NOT HAPPY Photo: MTV

RJ tries to talk to Amy later, but she doesn’t want to hear it because she thinks Jenny is interested. RJ doesn’t care about Jenny; he loves Amy, who replies, “We’re in high school, RJ. Nobody really loves anybody.” Touché.

The next day, Mr. and Ms. Pinkerton nominees give speeches to plead their case. A young lady — with fabulous hair, I might add — says that it’s “time for there to be a Ms. and Ms. Pinkerton!” Everyone in the audience cheers. Max looks uncomfortable on stage and Guillermo (the guy he hooked up with) smiles from the crowd. Throughout this gym sequence they keep sharing weird glances. After a while, they become funny rather than angsty.

Isn't her hair fabulous? No frizz! Photo: MTV

Then Robin gives her speech. She spits some pretty pathetic insults at RJ and Jenny. She doesn’t even mention the other girl — perhaps writers feared her character coming off as not just a bitch, but a homophobic bitch too — and claims that she and Max are not only the right choice, but the only choice because they’re a “Real couple.” Bitch, please.

Did I mention Lily is missing? She’s been puking a lot. Could Lily be pregnant? I bet my season one of The O.C. on it!

RJ steps up and hints at other students having secrets before using his speech to tell Amy he wants to be her boyfriend. She accepts (because he said the same thing as earlier, but in front of everyone) and they make-out with thunderous applause.

RJ & Amy, sittin in a tree... Photo: MTV

The students then start voting via text for Mr. and Ms. Pinkerton. Of course, Robin and Max win. Meanwhile, Miles and Hamilton head to the AV room and upload a sound clip of Robin calling the student body “drones” and saying that Max “may be as dumb as the dialogue in The Last Airbender.” Everyone is pissed and starts booing them off the stage. Max dumps Robin and she gets pelted with candy? Or popcorn? Obviously Jenny and RJ are named Mr. and Ms. Pinkerton by default!

While celebrating, I thought, “Wow, this is the first time in a long time that nothing bad happened to RJ Berger. No awkward mom making out with his teacher, no dad stripping for money in front of his girlfriend. Just something good.”

Lily has a secret. It's not that she looks awful in this photo. Photo: MTV

Then, as Max sort of thanks RJ for keeping his secret, before threatening to beat him up, Lily arrives. She looks more awful than usual before telling the group that she just came from the hospital. She’s preggers! (Who called it!) And it’s RJ’s baby!

So...what is he going to do now? Photo: MTV

Dun, dun, dun! Is that a cliffhanger or what? So much for RJ having a good day!

While this wasn’t the best episode of the season — in plot, dialogue or references — it tied up a few loose ends — Amy and then what they would do with Max’s secret — and it also left us with a pretty good cliffhanger. After all, what the heck is RJ going to do? Join the cast of 16 and Pregnant? Thus, I give the finale of The Hard Times of RJ Berger 3 OMG’s out of 5!

How many OMG’s would you give RJ Berger? Tell me in the comments!

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